A friend last year was concerned. Thinking I was lonely. In the past I would have said yes but no longer. What changed? Me.
For most of my life I lived on a deserted island, whether alone or amongst others. Not trusting others was a coping skill birthed in my childhood where alcoholism and abuse were mainstays. No one could be trusted. Not even the ones who love you.
Woe to anyone who betrayed my trust! Forgiveness was out of the question. If, and that was a big if! I allowed you to remain in my life. Never again would I allow you to hurt me. The mundane and unimportant were the topics reserved for our limited interactions. Intimacy—the sharing of my heart was off limits.
Only within the last decade have I learned to trust others and allow others to see my heart, the authentic me. How did I change? Jesus. He took my Humpty Dumpty heart and put it back together. The process required time, the shedding of tears and unequivocally trusting Him.
His incredible, unconditional love convinced me I was special. How? He
- faithfully walked alongside me throughout the process.
- encouraged me when I stumbled and fell or was fearful.
- carried me when I was no longer able to continue the journey.
- reminded me I would always be His beloved.
Have I suffered betrayal in this past decade? Yes! But unlike my childhood, I chose to forgive. Not setting sail for a deserted island, but remaining on Christ’s love boat. Where there is love, safety and the trip of a lifetime. Becoming who I was created to be— the authentic me!
Want to join me on the trip of a lifetime?
Thanks for listening to my voice! Feel free to like and share it with your friends.
Have a great day! Rita
Be a VOICE in the deafening sound of sameness!