Love one another as Jesus has loved us.

Oppenheim Bernhard Digital Vision Getty Images

Oppenheim Bernhard Digital Vision Getty Images

Creating a life of excellence doesn’t just happen. It’s a choice many refuse to make because of the fear of man. Choosing instead to be a people pleaser. An insidious paradigm that paralyzes you and suffocates your dreams.

Are you a people pleaser?

  • Is “me time” seldom or never on your daily “to do” list?
  • Do you overcommit and overpromise?
  • Are your acts of kindness motivated by fear or guilt?
  • Do you have difficulty expressing your feelings, desires or opinions?
  • Is your personality mercurial— situational?
  • Are you continually seeking external validation?
  • Do you believe conflict with others is ALWAYS negative?

Tired of being a people pleaser?

Learn how to say NO!

  • Don’t apologize.
  • Don’t give excuses.
  • Simply state your reasons for not wanting to do something.

Be kind to yourself. Maintain balance in your life.

  • Voice your opinion. No one can read you mind!
  • You can listen to others opinions, but they CANNOT be the determining factor in your decisions.
  • Establish boundaries for interpersonal relationships. Reconsider remaining in a relationship with anyone who belittles, ignores or violates these boundaries.

Be persistent.
Overcoming people pleasing requires concerted effort in the beginning. Eventually it will become automatic and effortless. Practice makes perfect.

Be patient with yourself and others because

  • change is uncomfortable and inconvenient.
  • threatens others and your perception of your identity.
  • disrupts the status quo.
  • replaces the familiar with the unfamiliar.

Take it from a former people pleaser. The day I made the decision to stop was one of the hardest and proudest moments of my life! I’ve NEVER regretted it.

Thanks for listening to my voice! Feel free to like and share it with your friends.

Have a terrific Tuesday! Rita

Be a VOICE in the deafening sound of sameness!

Be a VOICE shouting in the silence. Lets love others!

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