Monday a week ago I began a series about family. How a show from the 50s, Leave It To Beaver depicted positive attributes of a healthy and loving family that are as applicable today as they were then. In the Cleaver’s home.
- family values were discussed and modeled. (All For One and One For All)
- roles and corresponding responsibilities were clearly defined. (Growing Pains)
- rewards for appropriate behavior and negative consequences for inappropriate behavior were dispensed impartially and lovingly. (Making a Difference Today)
- adults’ actions and words were complimentary, not contradictory. (Take Me or Leave Me)
- love was demonstrated by providing temporal possessions AND emotional support.
Parental love is the first love each of us experience. A love that is so powerful that it ultimately shapes our personal identities.
As parents how can we love our children so that they are well-adjusted children AND adults? Our love must be unconditional and life-long. A love that is demonstrated through loving acts, deeds and words. A love that meets the individual physical and emotional needs of a child.
- Security (protection from harm)
- Consistency (set age appropriate limits— expectations and consequences)
- Affection (kiss on the cheek, a bear hug, a light pat on the back, spend time with the child)
- Respect (conveys the child is unique and special)
- Empower (allow participation in family decision-making process— gives child a sense of power, control and independence)
- Empathy (listen to, acknowledge and discuss what matters to the child)
- Offer words of encouragement
- Maintain eye contact when speaking to child
- Personally model what is morally and socially right
- Establish family traditions
- Help and guide your child’s involvement in extracurricular activities (no more than 3 activities)
Review the lists. Which is longer?
Perhaps this is why in America we have so many dysfunctional children and adults. In a culture in which the acquisition of material possessions is tantamount to success, the emotional— psychological is frequently sacrificed on the altar of the American dream.
Stop believing the lie that money buys happiness. Love buys happiness.
Thanks for listening to my voice! Feel free to like and share it with your friends.
Have a great day! Rita
Be the VOICE heard amidst the deafening sound of sameness!