On Monday I began a series about family. How a show from the 50s, Leave It To Beaver depicted positive family attributes that are as applicable today as they were then. In the Cleaver’s home
- family values were discussed and modeled.
- roles and corresponding responsibilities were clearly defined.
- rewards for appropriate behavior and negative consequences for inappropriate behavior were dispensed impartially and lovingly.
- adults’ actions and words were complimentary, not contradictory.
- love was demonstrated by providing temporal possessions AND emotional support.
Over the next few weeks we’ll explore each of these attributes. Beginning today with the foundation of any family— its value system.
Values
- are our attitudes— the standards for our actions and beliefs.
- affect our behavior.
- guide our decision making.
- are critical in building character and an overall sense of well-being.
Although not an exhaustive list of values, these are fundamental to building a loving and healthy family.
- Devotion— love and commitment
- Generosity— kindness and compassion
- Leadership— guidance and authority
- Loyalty— faithfulness and allegiance
- Spirituality— acknowledgment of God
So what can you do to foster positive family values?
- Build family memories by spending quality and quantity time together.
- Eat meals together, play together and build traditions together.
- Celebrate rites of passage and other life events.
- Spend a LOT of time talking with one another about trivial things as well as the important issues of life.
- Consider the feelings, thoughts, needs and preferences of other family members when making decisions.
- Acknowledge and value everyone’s thoughts, feelings and contributions to the family as a whole.
- Cheer one another onto victory.
- Offer a shoulder to cry upon.
- View stress or a crisis as an opportunity to grow and learn.
- Unite and pull together when things get tough.
- Seek outside help when needed.
- Provide a safe place to come back to when things don’t turn out as planned.
- Offer unconditional forgiveness.
- Honestly confess wrongdoing.
- Demonstrate mutual respect. Recognize strengths. Honestly and lovingly address weaknesses.
- Discuss God and how we honor Him by living a life of excellence and integrity.
- Serve others by volunteering.
- Engage in spiritual activities on a regular basis.
The dynamics of every family are unique because the family unit is composed of individuals. “One size fits all” isn’t applicable. Instead of following a proven formula, you must become proficient and comfortable with the trial and error method. Keeping what works and trashing what doesn’t. Regardless, if at the end of the day everyone in the family can shout, “All for one and one for all.” Then you know you’ve done your job well.
Thanks for listening to my voice! Feel free to like and share it with your friends.
Have a great day! Rita
Be the VOICE heard amidst the deafening sound of sameness!